Saturday 22 October 2011

Finger's ache

My mother is drinking. And she is for the last two years. Drunk 0,5 l of vodka yesterday + 2 beers + a glass of wine. My brother and his girlfriend were invited for a dinner, so I was so concerned... It was a shame. My mother was drunk, still asking my brother's girl questions (do you work today, what's about your work - the 'work' questions are not good, because my brother's girl has some problems with work, what's about your studies - she didn't pass her last exams). I've never been ashamed of my mother. And yesterday I was. I've never been a life on the party one. But yesterday I was. Because I was trying not to let it turn into the dissaster.

In the evening I was crying like a child. It was pathetic and funny ( I've realized it today) I was crying in the bath, surrounded by foam. Oh, in the Marylin Monroe style. :)

I can't excersise. My body's aching.The bloody sore muscles is killing me. I ate too much, but was walking for all the day. Of course there was more than 2000 kcal yesterday, but I'm fighting. I burned 600 kcal (walking for about 6 hours) + 40 kcal (100 squats) + 30 kcal ( 100 sit-ups). Not bad. Monday fast, here I come. 


I admitt it's getting better, it's getting better all the time, getting better all the time. Mantra.

I have to try today. Even my fingers are aching. Bloody Hell.

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